The Single Most Important Step to Discovering your Inner Compass

So many people believe that if they frantically search for their purpose that they’ll find it, unfortunately, what they miss is that purpose is discovered from being calm, quiet, and focused.

The Compass Story

The compass is one of the simplest tools, yet one of the most difficult to understand at times.

Of course, you know that the needle always points to magnetic north, but what if you don’t want to walk north? Now you have to think about your direction of travel in relation to the given ‘truth’ that the compass presents.

It can be frustrating.

The wobbling of your hand, the pivot of the needle, the movement of your body as a whole, all impact the steadiness of the presented reading.

It’s bad enough on land…now let’s complicate it.

Back when I was a PADI scuba diving instructor, one of my favorite classes to teach was navigation.

The ability to not get lost underwater can literally be life-saving. I can’t think of a better reason to learn a skill.

Sometimes a diver can use the underwater terrain to find their way back to the boat or shore. In these situations, there is an easily understandable external model that helps guide us back to safety.

Sometimes, particularly when we’re in unfamiliar territory or confused, we have to rely on the tools that we have available. In this case specifically, our underwater compass.

I remember one student who was in a hurry. He wanted to prove himself and his skills, so he rushed through the course that I had designed.

At each point, he’d quickly adjust to the next heading and kick off in a fury of speed.

When he finally came to the surface, he was 40 feet away from the intended marker.

Frustrated, he threw his compass at the shore and screamed, “I just don’t get this shit!!!”

(Unfortunately, that was my compass that he threw. Fortunately, it wasn’t broken.)

It was clear to me in that moment that we had reached his limit. There was no more space for learning until he could calm down.

To be successful he needed to get out of his emotional overload that was seated in a feeling of failure and driving an overload in his head of multiple thoughts of how he wasn’t good enough.

Until his body and mind were quiet again, we could not proceed.

After a break so he could calm down, we discussed new strategies for success.

What’s different?

What was driving his frustration?

Part of it was that he knew how to use a compass. He was a hiker and camper; he was familiar with the tool on land.

How hard could it be to use it in the water?

The answer to that question is: As hard as we choose to make it.

One of the problems he had failed to recognize with underwater navigation is that there are more moving parts to the equation.

On land, it’s easy to stop and become still to allow the needle to settle.

But underwater? That’s a different story.

Not only is the compass needle shaking in an effort to align to north, the diver is floating weightless at the mercy of the effects of the motion of the water. Now we have two moving objects – one holding the other – attempting to find a stable direction.

Have you ever heard the joke about too many moving parts? It’s about how too many shifting elements reduces our ability to focus and act effectively.

This is a real situation with too many moving parts. Unless we take control of what is in our power to effect.

Taking Control

What was in his control?

His speed, his choice to stop (or not), his focus, and most importantly, his attitude.

As we prepared for his next attempt, he took a deep breath before descending.

I could see the focus in his eyes as we settled in* next to the first marker and he completely came to a stop on the bottom. Breathing 3 or 4 deep breaths, he held his compass flat so it would rotate freely and gave it time to settle.

Then he pushed off and began the course.

This time, he slowed down. No longer rushing, he took the time to fully settle on the bottom* at each waypoint and allow himself and his tool to align in that place of calm.

(*NOTE: Unless in a training environment on a sandy or rocky bottom, a diver should NEVER come in contact with the bottom. This training took place in a controlled location with a rock bottom. No aquatic life was endangered during this training.)

This time, when he surfaced, he was six inches away from the intended marker. Quite a difference!

And the whole process took less time than the earlier rushed attempt that resulted in frustration and anger.

Rather than throwing the compass in frustration, he now took a deep breath from a place of calm, confident success.

He had overcome the challenge of the imposter that said, “I just don’t get this shit,” and won.

Lesson

On the surface, (no pun intended) the lesson here seems to be slow down to be successful.

But that is only part of the message.

The deeper learning here is one of personal acceptance and allowance to come into alignment.

When this student was trapped in his mental prison of the imposter, he believed himself to be not good enough complete a relatively simple navigation course.

At this moment, he was the compass looking for his true north. Figuratively, he was the wobbly needle bouncing to and fro between NNW and ENE while also nervously shaking on his balancing point.

When he failed, the imposter beat him up even further, reminding him with confirmations of “I told you so,” and leading to a tantrum.

After he had calmed, when we moved him from an emotional overload (heart overload) and balanced his energy with some head-centered thinking, he was able to harness the energy of his desire for success with a plan to make it happen.

You can do the same.

That One Step

How can you apply this?

By taking the same action.

Stop and breathe. Allow yourself to calm so that you can find your alignment.

Your body knows what it is. You know it too, when you give yourself the time to pause and feel it.

It tends to be a calm feeling in your core, a gut sensation of confidence and wisdom.

There is a peaceful quality to it; some say it feels solid, some call it fluid and flexible. The common factor is a sense of stability.

If you feel like you are bouncing still, pause longer.

Come down into your body and let it settle. Too often we get into overload states and forget to connect with the wisdom of our physical body.

The Exercise

You can do this standing, sitting, or lying down.

Close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths from your belly, expanding your diaphragm and filling your lungs.

Breathe in slowly through your nose to a count of 4 or more.

Pause for a moment, then breathe out slowly through your mouth.

When you breathe out, think of the words that correspond to how you’d like to feel. Pick one and say it as you exhale. For example, ‘relax,’ ‘calm,’ ‘peaceful,’ ‘focused,’ ‘in control,’ or whatever comes to mind for you.

Repeat 3 times.

Make this a daily habit and you will begin to find yourself in a more centered and aligned place both emotionally and mentally.

Take a deep look at the world from that place of alignment and you will discover your true north.

The Offer

If you are feeling like you are floating helplessly against the currents of the world, that you don’t know which way to turn to find your happiness and purpose, let’s talk.

Just as I taught diving students to breathe and achieve while submerged, I’m here to help you find your way when it feels like you are living underwater.

I only offer a few of these conversations each month to individuals who are committed to finding their direction and fully living it.

Are you one of them? PM me and let me know.