Coaching The Conflicting Energies of Resignation
The choice is yours: Be resigned to what is, or resign and create what can be.
When you hear (or read) the word ‘Resignation,’ what is your first thought?
Is it one of limitation and victim-hood, resigned to your circumstances and fate?
Or, is it one of living and declaring your power: resigning from a negative environment or experience so that you can expand your being?
2024 marks the ten-year anniversary of my first full resignation without a safety net.
I had known a change was coming in my life. Many things around me were in flux.
If I were to use a tarot card to illustrate the energy of 2014, it would be the Wheel of Fortune: What goes up, must come down. What is down, will rise.
On Halloween of that year, I left my sales career behind, moved from Kansas City to Florida with my soon-to-be wife, and started my professional life over from scratch.
Yes, it was a full reinvention.
It was scary financially. It had moments of severe frustration and near-depression. And it all brought me to who I am now.
Be Resigned, or Resign?
Resignation has interestingly complex definitions.
On one hand, resignation is “the act of giving up your job or position” (Oxford Learner’s Dictionary).
On another, it is the “State of uncomplaining acceptance in the face of something undesirable but unavoidable” (WordHippo).
Do you see the difference in energy between these two meanings?
The latter is a victim presence, uncomplaining acceptance of the undesirable. AKA: Life sucks then you die.
The former is active ownership, choice, and creation. AKA: This doesn’t work for me, so I’m outta here.
So, the question for your life becomes, do you choose to be resigned to what’s happening, or do you resign from what is to create what you want?
Or: Do you become resigned TO your energy of resignation, or do you resign FROM your energy of resignation? Yeah, that’s a mind-bender.
Ultimately, what energy do you choose to commit to?
The Most Important Step in Choosing to Move Forward
When you make the choice to resign, as in actively choosing to move forward in your life with intentional creation, sometimes old thoughts and feelings linger that can get in the way of your next experience.
The biggest one is holding onto resentment.
Even when you are the one choosing to leave a difficult situation, taking ownership of your actions, it’s easy to look back on what was and still feel frustrated over what brought you to your decision point.
That’s natural. It takes time to heal, and there could be some learning to be found in reflection.
But…if you hold that resentment, it will just get in the way of what you want to create.
So, how do you move on from it?
Appreciation and gratitude.
Huh? What? Appreciate what pissed me off?
Yup.
It served you until it didn’t. That’s an easy idea to miss when you’re angry.
How did it serve you to become who you are in this moment?
In many ways, you could not have made your choice to own your power and walk away if you had not had the experiences that led to it.
So, appreciate it and let it go with gratitude.
Here are a few ideas for finding your shift from resignation to gratitude:
1. What did the situation provide for you over the time you experienced it? If it was a job, how did the role support you with income, title, learning, etc?
2. How did the exact events that lead to your choice to leave actually help you to discover your strength? Don’t focus here on what angered you, instead realize that you were brought to critical mass to discover your boundaries and enforce them. That’s a huge moment of self-awareness.
3. Write them down. Reflect on them. Say “Thank you for serving me. I appreciate you and the wisdom you delivered to me. I release you with gratitude.”
At the end of 2023, I closed a chapter of my life by resigning from a situation that no longer served me.
(Yes, we’re all on this journey together. I’d be a hypocrite if I didn’t walk my talk.)
2024 is a year of active, intentional growth and change that could only happen after I created space to allow new things to flow in. The next chapter is here for me to write on fresh, blank pages.
What space can you open up, do you want to open up, in 2024? What do you wish to invite in as your next experience?
What have you become resigned to that you wish to choose to resign from?
How can I serve you to make that choice?
